I think I'm figuring it out.

I read these journals of people who are "stuck" in a certain mode or modes. They go through the same cycles continually - all the while complaining that things never change. To those of you - and you know who you are - WAKE THE FUCK UP! Do something about it.

Stop being selfish.

Stop thinking that everything you do is some sort of a fucking sacrifice.

Stop thinking that you are so "entitled" to anything you want.

Stop being so god-damned self centered and realize that you have real issues to deal with in life. Yes - it may be unfair, but this is the world you live in and you simply must play by some of the rules. You can't effect change by just bitching all the time and spouting off truly witty things like, "I'm just not going to let myself fall into the role society thinks I should." It's not witty. It's petty. You can only change things when you can prove or show that there is a reason for the change. Prove to me that there is something better to be gained by falling behind on all kinds of payments - prove to me that bitching about how all you want to do is your "art" but NEVER GETTING ANYWHERE with it does any good. Show me that you love the child you brought into the world even though you didn't want him, and don't do shit to take care of him.

Yes - I am a corporate tool. Yes - I follow most of the rules of society. And yes - I like it that way.

You know why? Because it affords me a life that I fucking love. It enables me to live comfortably and spend time with my wife and child. That's the focus of all I do. Sure - I would like more time to myself every now and then, and I don't always want to come to work, and I don't always want to make a sacrifice, and I don't always want to ... you get the picture. But I do these things because I need to.

It pisses me off to read the stupid words you write. Pretending to be so devoted to your job and family and doing the right thing. It pisses me off to think that you actually believe that you are so great, and that you have done/contributed so much that you have now "lost" some of yourself, and well, isn't that proof of how dedicated you are. It's all bullshit. And it pisses me off because you sometimes use words that I would like to use to express how I feel about my relationship with my wife and son. But somehow the words have been raped and molested. They are now dirty and worthless simply because you use them too.

How indiscriminate and pretentious and fake of you to use my words in such a way. How selfish and childish of you. And how sorry I feel for you. You seem so very lost in this world. And maybe you are right - maybe you don't belong here. Maybe you were meant for greater things, or maybe not. Perhaps in another life you will be happy and won't repeat the same mistakes. Maybe next time you won't need to rely on so many people for so many things (time, money, support) and you'll be world famous, the way you wish you were now. Maybe then you will finally break out of this petty, petty cycle of greed.

Maybe next time you can use your actions to show what a fucking great person you are.

Leave my words alone.

previous - next

duh - 2008-09-15

hi mac - 2006-12-12

corporate whore - 2006-11-03

new - 2006-10-05

elvis costello sings for you - 2006-09-27

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What I Read(for fun and amusement)

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